Self-Defense! What is Self-defense Psychology

Self-defense (self-defence in many varieties of English) is a countermeasure that involves defending the health and well-being of oneself from harm. The use of the right of self-defense as a legal justification for the use of force in times of danger is available in many jurisdictions, but the interpretation varies widely.

Physical
Physical self-defense is the use of physical force to counter an immediate threat of violence. Such force can be either armed or unarmed. In either case, the chances of success depend on a large number of parameters, related to the severity of the threat on one hand, but also on the mental and physical preparedness of the defender.

Mental 
Mental self-defense is the ability to get into the proper mindset for executing a physical self-defense technique. Many martial arts schools and self-defense classes focus primarily on the physical nature of self-defense and often neglect the mental aspect. If you are skilled in the physical aspects of a defensive technique, but lack the mental toughness and tenacity to execute it, you will not be able to perform - especially under duress. Controlled environments cannot easily mimic the stress and adrenaline dump which occurs during an attack. There is a very real need to be able to enter the proper "warrior mindset" if one is to have a realistic chance of surviving a potentially deadly encounter. This warrior mindset is the ability to focus purely on the successful outcome of a situation without becoming concerned with the consequences, even if they prove fatal in the dedicated pursuit of your desired outcome. The ability to go over, under, around or through any obstacle is the essence of this "never quit" mindset - similar to that of the Samurai of Japan. Self-preservation is a very powerful motivator and it is essential for ensuring that one has the mental toughness and proper mindset to emerge the victor in an encounter with one or more attackers/aggressors.

What is Self-defense: Psychology

Now, when I talk of psychology, I’m not referring to diagnosing mental disorders, although your attacker may very well have one.  What I am referring to is the thought process and motivation of a predator and how to influence them both overtly and subtly.  I’m also talking about your own psychology, specifically, fear management and threat management.  Your success in these two areas are determined by your awareness that they exist and training your psychological faculties as well as, if not more than, your physical techniques.

Now, when discussing self-defense psychology, let’s first address the elephantIN THE ROOM when it comes to any scenario: FEAR.  You’ll hear people tell you to conquer your fear, control your fear, eliminate your fear or anything else that tries to alleviate the presence of fear.  Well, guess what?  You can’t do that.  Why?  Simply put, fear is a name given to an automatic physiological response.  Some call it the “fight or flight” response, some call it the survival mechanism, some call it an adrenaline rush and some call it fear.  Whatever you call it, it still refers to the physical symptoms your body exhibits while experiencing “fear” stimuli.  It is near impossible to control a physiological response.  But, we can do things to “numb” the triggers and we can take measures so we can use the fear response to our favor.

First, we can try to “numb” the fear trigger so that it kicks in at a higher level of danger.  Remember, this is NOT the same as eliminating fear.  We are simply trying to get it to engage at the last possible moment.  How do you do this?  Simple, just try to replicate the scenarios that trigger fear.  In the arena of self-defense, this means making your simulations as real as possible.  I don’t mean hauling off and pummeling your fellow students.  What I mean is replicating the emotional conditions of an altercation as well as the physical ones.  An example would be if you’re practicing defenses against being grabbed, don’t just stand there and randomly grab your partner so they can do their technique and defend.  This merely trains a technique without context.  Again, try to simulate the ENTIRE scenario.  GRAB your partner, yell at them, curse at them, anything to get them “riled up” and feeling the fear response.  You will see a drastic difference in their performance when they are “jacked up” on adrenaline.  The more exposure you have to this mode of training, the more you will become used to it and the higher your tolerance to fear stimuli will be.  This training style, honestly, can only do so much to increase your tolerance.  Its real beauty lies in showing you how to make fear work for you.

Most people know the effects of fear.  Some of these effects include increased heart rate, increased breathing, muscle twitching and tunnel vision.  Fear can cause you to freeze up at the worst possible time.  These effects are caused by the release of adrenaline into your system.  As stated before, you cannot stop this process or its effects on your body.  What you can do is recognize these effects so that they will not impede on your performance.  Adrenaline is one the best performance enhancers you can have.  The problem is that most people are so unfamiliar with its effects that they interpret it as psychological fear and freeze up.  This is what your training should try to remedy.  Recognizing when the fear response has happened and how to manage the interpretation of the effects so that they can work for you.  Again, you cannot stop or control the response, but you can guide it so that it is not a hindrance, but a boon.  Think of the adrenaline rush or fear response in terms of surfing.  As a surfer, you cannot stop the wave and you cannot control the wave.  But, if you’re aware of the wave’s power and you understand how the wave is moving, you can guide yourself to any position on the wave, perform great feats on the wave and eventually end up safely on the beach.  It takes practice and calm, but it can be done.  This holds true for self-defense applications as well.

Another psychological aspect to keep in mind when dealing with yourself is the opposite of fear.  It’s the ego.  This can be even more detrimental than fear.  Confidence is the key to proper threat management; over-confidence is the key to disaster.  Just as fear can cause you to freeze up, ego can cause you to go head-first into a situation you may not be able to control.  The easiest way that your ego can get a hold of you is through the “wussy complex”.  This is the want to not be perceived as a coward or a weakling.  Sometimes, during an aggressive confrontation, the aggressor just wants confirmation that he is bigger, stronger and better than you.  If he gets this, he will walk away.  Now, to give this to him will require a very big hit to your ego.  Guess what?  The ego does NOT take hits well!  Your ego will do everything it can to not get bruised, and this is what can lead you into a fight with this guy.  Now, letting him walk away thinking whatever he wants while keeping yourself out of harm’s way may not be the “cool” thing to do, but it fits our definition of self-defense perfectly.  This also ties into the previous topic of fear.  Don’t let the fear of being perceived as weak affect your good judgment.

Another way that your ego can get the better of you is if you let your emotions dictate your actions and not rational thought.  The aggressor, more than likely, will use language that will elicit prescribed emotions.  They may use profanity, yelling, racial slurs, sexist slurs, derogatory remarks or any other verbal tactic to get you upset and possibly get you off guard. This is, of course, what they want and it will put you at an extreme disadvantage.  So don’t let your ego goad you into fighting when you can avoid it, but don't let it freeze you up when you need to act because then you are playing they’re game, and that's exactly what they want. Instead, try acting submissive or afraid (you may not have to <em>act</em>).  This will lead the assailant to believe they have the better of you. If they think that, they will attack in an overconfident way.  This will allow you the few precious moments you need to successfully defend yourself.

The last way your ego will get you into trouble is the “toughman complex”.  This is when you try to “warn” the aggressor by stating your martial art or fighting résumé. You can either do this verbally or non-verbally.  The way you can verbally warn an aggressor is simple.  You might think that you can scare your opponent by saying something like, “Hey, leave me alone.  I’m a black belt (or insert another high rank here) in Karate (or insert another martial art here)!”  You can non-verbally tip off your opponent by dropping into some kind of fancy martial art stance or make fists and bounce around like a boxer or any other motions or gestures that might indicate you’ve had some kind of training.  Now, whether the statements are true or not or the gestures can be backed up or not is irrelevant.  If the attacker thinks you’re a skilled fighter, he will alter his approach and may be less apt to make a mistake.  Any mistake your opponent makes is always a good thing for you.  You would be served much better to be underestimated as being able to defend yourself than overestimated or even accurately estimated.  If you’re opponent thinks you would be an easy target, then if he attacks, it may not be fully committed or even sloppy.  This gives you a much better chance of defending it.  Before we move on the external component of psychology, think on this:  In every self-defense situation you face multiple opponents; you and your attacker(s).  If you can’t manage yourself, then you’ll never manage your opponent(s).

The other part of the psychological aspect of self-defense is focused on the aggressor.  The aggressor’s psychology must be observed and analyzed as well, to help you better defend yourself.  This first thing you must understand is that the fear and ego problems discussed previously also apply to your opponent.  They’re human, just like you, and they have to deal with the same issues as you.  So if you are aware of the symptoms of fear and ego, then you can recognize them in your opponent and use this knowledge to your advantage.  If you identify that your opponent is afraid and is actually just posturing, then you are probably more likely to talk him out of attacking.  If not, then you may end up fighting with him and getting hurt.  Again, if the assailant isn’t aware of these things, yet you are, you will be at a tremendous advantage and will increase yourODDS of defending yourself by an order of magnitude.  There are two quotes from Sun Tzu in The Art of War that I would like to reference.

So it is said that if you know your enemies and know yourself, you will fight  without danger in battles.
If you only know yourself, but not your opponent, you may win or may lose.
If you know neither yourself nor your enemy, you will always endanger yourself.

Therefore one hundred victories in one hundred battles is not the most skillful.
Seizing the enemy without fighting is the most skillful.

These two quotes state two very IMPORTANT concepts in the realm of self-defense.  The first one basically states that knowledge precedes victory, ignorance precedes defeat.  To believe that you can successfully defend yourself because you study some form of fighting is an ignorant stance.  Just because you THINK you can fight, doesn’t mean you CAN fight or defend your self.  And even if you can fight, it doesn’t mean that your opponent cannot fight better than you.  To realize that self-defense primarily involves knowing your environment and understanding people is the knowledge that will keep you safe.  The second quote emphasizes the virtue of being able to overcome your opponent without fighting.  In the context of self-defense, overcoming your opponent simply means you were able to survive the encounter.  If you can survive the encounter without fighting, then this is the pinnacle of self-defense.  You can attack your attacker's strategy and escape with no harm to yourself. That is the goal of true self-defense.

The final way that psychology and understanding people can aid in self-defense is by knowing what predators are looking for and where they are looking for it.  This facet, combined with awareness is how you can avoid most predicaments in the first place.  The sad fact is that there are people in the world who just want to hurt other people.  That’s the bad news.  The good news is, there’s a catch.  The catch is that they are not going to pick someone that they think will hurt them back.  Nobody picks a fight that they think they will lose.  OK, maybe there’s a Tyler Durden or two out there, but the reality is that no one attacks someone they think can beat them.  In essence, they’re not looking for an opponent; they’re looking for a victim.  What does this have to do with psychology?  Simple, if your carry yourself in a manner that is victim-like, then you represent the predator's preferred type and you will be more likely to be his target.  If, however, your carry yourself unlike a victim, then you can shut the aggressor down, at the psychological level, and he will pass you up for an easier target.

The previous paragraph covered “the who” of victim selection, now let’s talk about “the where”.  Is your favorite ATM machine the one located in the dark alley in the bad part of town and it’s only operational between 1:00 and 3:00 AM?  Alright, that might be an exaggerated scenario, but you see what I’m getting at.  People who like to cause trouble tend to hang out in designated areas.  If there’s a bar that’s known for its rougher crowd, then, if self-defense is truly your goal, you should avoid that establishment at all costs.  If there are parts of town you know to be a bit dangerous, then don’t go there unless you have a specific, legitimate reason to.  This seems like a “no-brainer”, but it can sneak up on you if you let it.  Harking back to the section of psychology that deals with yourself, remember that certain trains of thought can be counter-productive to self-defense.  If you couple that with a human being’s keen ability to lie to their self and rationalize their behavior, well, you have a recipe for disaster.

Just understand that there are places that can expose you to violence easier than others due to the crowd that they attract or the opportunites they can offer.  One of the best ways to defend yourself is to stay away from those places that have those people.This may not always be possible, but it's a great start.  Again, understand the psychology of a perpetrator.  

As we wind down the discussion of psychology and the non-physical aspects of self-defense, we need to reflect on some points made.  First, I believe that you can defend yourself, or in other words keep yourself safe, 95% of the time without ever having to execute, or even know, a martial art technique.  This is a radical concept for most martial artists.  They focus so intently on the proper execution of technique that they miss the bigger picture as to why they are performing the techniques and under what context.  Now, if your goal is simply to master a marital art or earn a black belt, then by all means, focus on that.  There’s absolutely nothing wrong with that and it is an admirable goal.  I’m not saying it’s a waste of time.  I’m, also, not saying don’t study martial arts or don’t work on perfecting technique.  Not at all!  What I am saying is that you need to take an honest look at what your goal of training is and then see if your approach to training achieves that goal.  If not, then simply alter the training modality until it does.